Trip, and Return

The trip has happened, and I'm back in SF with a purpose: to officially start preparing my life to move to NY.

No worries, my dear West Coast friends, this will not be happening overnight, or even in the next couple months. There's too much debt and too many ends that need tying up to disentangle myself from California so quickly. But it's time now to start the cleansing process.

I spent 11 days on Manhattan, staying in a hotel room alone for the first half, and then having my sister join me (very last minute) for the latter half. (To be honest, the first half of the trip was better, when I was only concerned with myself and not having to deal with someone else as well.) And from the minute I touched down, even with a 50-pound suitcase to lug on the subway and across town, even with barely two hours of sleep in my system, I was so incredibly happy and alive-feeling. I said last year that returning to NY was like slipping into an old favorite pair of jeans. This year was like being with a favorite friend, someone who makes you feel good just by being around.

It was so very hard to come back.

The game plan for the next year or so (and it's an appropriate time to be making game plans, being the mid-point of the year and all), in no particular order:

1. Aggressively pay off the debt. I mean the credit card debt here, because I don't think I'll be able to pay off the $38,000 or so in student loans I have left in a year. The $3,000 on my credit card, though — and most of that is from this very trip I just took — is probably more doable. If I can actually do that while at the same time slipping some funds into my savings, so much the better. This probably means no trips for a long time. And possibly knitting for income and opening up an Etsy store instead of letting all this beautiful yarn rot around me.
   
2. Pull back from my social network a bit here in SF. I don't mean I won't be hanging out ... I just need to do it less (see 1. above). And I'm not going to be actively looking for new friends ... or especially a love life. Still not sure if I'm keeping my ceramics class or not; I did sign up for this next session, but after that I don't know if it's worth continuing or if I just should save that $210 every two months. This also means more nights spent at home, or trying to get friends interested in at-home dinner parties/movie nights instead of hitting the bar and spending $80 on drinks and a cab every Friday.
   
3. Lose weight. Ever a goal, but this time I think I mean it. I've slowly been creeping up again, and I want to be my fittest (and healthiest) when I go. Which means still giving money to the JCC for their exercise facilities. But also hopefully spending less money on food, if I eat less, especially at restaurants.
   
4. Get things together at work.
   
5. Purge my apartment of unnecessary stuff. This can wait until I'm closer to departure.

I do plan on making at least one more "pilgrimage" up to Portland at some point, but for the most part I hopefully will be a big homebody for a while now. I hope I can keep this up; I'm not used to disciplining myself so much.

Is it too late to move to NY at the age of 30? I hope not.

Oh, and pictures from the trip can be found on my Flickr, here

Landed

Last weekend my internet connection went out, so after waiting 24 hours I had to give Comcast a call so they'd send out a technician. While they had me on the phone, the woman helping me mentioned that they had a special deal going on — for basically the same price I'm paying now, I could have high speed internet and phone service through Comcast. The deal lasts a year, at which point I can call them again and see if there are any other deals, or just cancel the service completely. I don't think I could say no; my cell phone gets really shoddy reception in my apartment, so I can't be on the phone AND walking around doing things like cooking dinner or mooching at my computer.

So now I have a landline, and a 415 phone number. My cell phone, for those who have the number, is the same as before, and I'm keeping it, of course. If you want my 415 number, shoot me an email and if I know you, it's yours.

I've been pretty quiet the last couple of weeks, but I've had a lot on my mind. Going to New York in just under two weeks. When I get back, I'm going to be starting the process of getting my life together and deciding where to settle. And also to find someone to settle down with.

My life is good and stable, the only thing missing is that person to share it with. I found out last week that a couple of people I know are getting married next month, and having a baby this September. For the first time maybe ever, this type of news really struck a chord deep inside me. I'm 28 years old, still single, with pretty much no hopes of settling down with the person I want to be with. It's just kind of depressing, sometimes.

Going Commando

Being low on quarters, it's been a couple weeks since I had a chance to do laundry. Hence, my stock of comfortable underwear (panties that will not give me a wedgie or bind my fattened buttocks) is dangerously low. Tuesday afternoon I found myself down to an old high-leg that's probably from my college years ... or the slightly-too-tight low-rise pair I bought 10 pounds ago (that's 10 pounds lighter, yo). I opted for the high-legs, but they were so loose and uncomfortable (and the elastic around the waist was so annoying) that I ended up removing them halfway through the night and going the rest of my work evening sans culottes.

The dilemma came up again yesterday afternoon. I eyed my last pair of wearable panties (the too-tights). I put them on and squirmed uncomfortable, trying to decide if I could get used to the binding. Then I remembered the night before, and the hours of wedgie-less comfort.

So I spend the day commando. Went to an afternoon meeting at the office, then to pub trivia, then back to work for my normal shift, with nothing between my cooch and the world except my double-lined work pants. And I loved it.

And that's my confession for the day, as well as my suggestion. Let your delicates be free from the annoyance of underwear. Strip off that nasty garment, and rejoice.

In other news, I stumbled upon this on Facebook. My friend posted it on another friend of hers' profile. These were my favorite Sesame Street characters when I was a kid. Enjoy.

Chrlorinated

So I went swimming-for-exercise again for the first time in almost two years this morning. Was so tempted to skip it — it was a stressful night at work, I was tired, yadda yadda — but I had my swimsuit and my hair tie this time, dammit. No excuses. I did pretty well; a full 20 minutes, and I felt like I could have done more but made myself stop so I wouldn't be pushing myself. (Too late, though: I felt all woozy and slightly nauseous in the locker room and the whole bus ride home. Until I got here and became ravenous and devoured a quarter of a jicama and some ranch dressing.)

Having Nick here this weekend only slightly disrupted my diet — impressive, because usually I'm completely off it when I'm around him. We made Sangria (low-carb with Splenda for me, real sugar for him), I baked him a honey-mustard Cornish game hen (derailed my diet a bit eating the skin off that sucker, too ... mm, honey mustard deliciousness), went to a barbecue where I managed to eat only Atkins-approved foods. Good thing I like asparagus and mushrooms and chicken. And now I'm thinking I want a Cornish game hen, too, but it'll need a day or two to defrost in the fridge, so I can't have it tonight. ;P Or right now. Boo.

Gotta think about next weekend. I'm working the Blues Festival with Nick's family and the lunch they give their volunteers involves a bean burrito and chips, candy and a soda. Probably not the best for my diet. I'll have to bring some cash and buy some real food. And then the family dinner afterwards ... perhaps I should pack a bag of beef jerky, just in case.

All this so I fit into my pants while I'm in New York. Really, I should be aiming to be completely hot for NY, so I can land a boyfriend out there, providing me an anchor to make The Move. I'm getting excited now, and kind of glad to have some sort of motivation from somewhere to get my ass in gear.

By the way, this week is starting out much better than last week. Busy stressful night aside. And this post is otherwise completely pointless. Just an excuse to write something.

American Grafitti [sic]

A couple pieces of "urban poetry art" down the street from my apartment that make me think, "Gee, maybe we shouldn't teach hoi polloi how to write."



A better question would be, "When does my spray paint spellcheck turn on?"



... yeah, I don't think there's going to be a wedding happening anytime soon. Sorry, hon.

And then, while checking my Flickr page yesterday, I came across this frightening piece of evidence that the English language is completely going to shite:



Please excuse the French, I like to make some things difficult on myself. Like Flickr.

I wonder if this nitpickyness is really me, or just the 4th day of the Atkins diet talking? Hmm.

In for a Grumpy Time

The Good:

So, I'm going to New York at the end of June. I've got my plane ticket, I've got my PTO approved, and also been approved to work a week on the graveyard shift while I'm out there (I fly in June 20, leave July 1, and work the week of the 22nd). Just need to get my hotel room ... which is going to be by far the most expensive portion of the trip. Thank heavens for credit cards.

This trip is important in a couple ways. 1) I need to escape the West Coast for a bit, and indulge my inner Big City Girl. I've been missing New York like crazy this year, especially after Geof spent a few days out there and kept rubbing it in via text message about every 3 hours (slight exaggeration). 2) It's getting time to decide: do I stay or do I go? I said that last year's trip was the one to help me decide if I was going to move back to NYC, but that's not what ended up happening. I spent too much time beforehand gallivanting in Maryland and Boston, and didn't really spend much time enjoying the city the week I was there, on account of work.

The plan this time: Get there on a Friday, spend the nights starting on Sunday working for a week, and then still have about four days to just wander around the city and try to place myself in it. Is it what will make me happy?

I think this year, the choice will be a more important one to make, because I've finally formed my niche in the SF office, and now have to decide if I want to stick with it, or start over (almost) afresh in NY. I still won't be able to move back east for probably a year — my finances dictate that much. But if I have a goal in sight, I can start pulling back and living cheaply here with the aim of affording the move ... or I can start putting myself out more and trying to find a stable relationship and enjoyable friendships here.

The Grumpy:

I spent the weekend a mess. I spent a lot of the weekend feeling empty and trying to distract myself with the Mom-Worship Day, but still ended up calling out sick both Sunday and Monday nights ... and I'm thinking most of the sick stems from the disappointment, but who knows? I was fighting something off late last week, so perhaps it just decided to rear its ugly head Sunday afternoon. Bastard.

Added bonus, this coincides with my decision to lose weight before I go to NY — I've gained about 10 pounds, and need my work pants to fit before I head out there, dammit. Which means I started Atkins again yesterday, which means I'm going to be a crabby, carb-craving bitch for another week or so before my body balances out. It also means much less alcohol than I've been drinking lately ... so I'm not going to be sedated as much anymore, either. Grrr ... miss wine already.

Let's Begin Now

Not sure what I created this blog for ... there's some vague idea rolling around my head to make this into a display of things I make and write. A way to prove to the world, and to myself, that I'm a creative person.

We'll see. At the moment, though, I'm mostly concerned with the blister on my middle finger (see it? haha ... I just flipped you off by showing you) and the fact that my "Tandoori Chicken" really isn't red enough. This bothers me.

At any rate, this may end up being the only entry ... or it could be the first in my vast Blogger Empire of entries. Time will tell.

Word.