Waiting for Magic

Daffodils are my favorite flowers, which is kind of saddening when you realize they are only available at this time of year. The rest of the year I have to make do with other, lesser blooms. I'm waiting for this batch to Pop open.

I had a friend over tonight for crockpot-carnitas tacos. (And yes: they were amazingly delicious. I make a good spice rub.) The best part about having a guest over — aside from the whole "I have friends!" joy, and the conversation, and the sharing of food, and all the other things — is that it really is the only thing that actually motivates me to clean the apartment. Never can do it just for myself.

I leave for my Disneyland vacation in less than 36 hours, and only just now did I bother to rustle through my papers to find the Disney Rewards card I'd gotten from Chase. I've had a "Mickey Mouse" card for years now, and the big rewards was Disney dollars. (Not that I was thinking about the rewards at the time I signed up for the card: I was thinking about the 0% APR on transferred balances, and the crazy-at-the-time 17% APR I had on my Discover card. Disney dollars were bonus, even if I never used 'em.) This is now $170 I wouldn't really be able to spend anywhere else — The Disney Stores don't have movies anymore, it seems, which is a bummer — meaning that my living paycheck-to-paycheck habit just got me a free Disneyland lunch. And maybe one of those mouse ear hats. Huzzah.

A Salty Motto

I know I've done a great workout this week because my arms are sore with bruising, and there were two or three days where I couldn't cross my legs without pain.

I also recently got more evidence that I'm becoming entrenched in this city. And a reminder that it's really a small, small town. On Tuesday evening, I met up for a drink with a guy who, it turns out, works with my good friend Jeremy. Completely random. This sort of thing happens to me with greater and greater frequency these days.

That last week was a blur — Wednesday was the only day I actually had the evening to myself (aside from Krav); there was a lot of wine poured down my throat, come to think of it. My usual Clay and Wine class on Monday, wine at my local on Tuesday, a Castro wine bar on Wednesday, and last night had friend Claire down for a bottle of Mourvèdre and half a bottle of the only port wine I've ever really enjoyed. And I think I'm going out for brunch with mimosas this morning. Making up for last week's home-sickness? I certainly hope so.

These Things Do Happen

Dear Anonymous Driver on the Bridge,

I just wanted you to know that when you paid for my toll on the Bay Bridge today, it was exactly what I needed. Not sure if you could tell that I was having to scrounge for that fifth dollar, but your unexpected gift to a stranger came at exactly the right moment in my life.

Thank you — it's nice to know that people can still be pretty awesome.

Love and blessings,

Sarah.

Daffodils Should Be Available Year-Round

And carnations should only be used for funerals. Here's a hint, by the way: don't give me a carnation. (My mom's family has a big ol' superstitious aversion to carnations, and while I may not believe in heaven or purgatory or ghosts or seven years of bad luck, I do believe in family superstitions.)

(One day I will might write a book about my family. And there will be a chapter devoted to these superstitions.)

Today proved that 24 hours can make a big difference — as can a change of scene. After nearly four days cooped up by myself in my apartment, wallowing in my sorrows, violently coughing up phlegm, watching Veronica Mars and eating pancakes, I was near ready to ... well, joking's not a good idea, but I was in a pretty bad state of mind. I have two paragraphs of a depressing blog post started in my "Draft Posts" file, and thankfully I don't feel like finishing it.

This tells me I really should get out more, if a day at the office and then an hour spent punching things at Krav can give me a complete 180 on my mood. That's all it takes? Imagine what something fun and indulgent can do.

By the way: I am trying. I promise. It's just hard because, dammit, I know the difference.

And there's a quick burst of rain passing by my window, telling me it's time to shut things down and lie there listening until I fall asleep. I'm coming, Tlaloc.